The Rise of the "Solo Date" and Why It's so Empowering
The hashtag “#solodate” on Tik Tok has over 355 MILLION posts.
It’s full of people partaking in activities alone that would normally be done with someone else. Such as going out to dinner, going to the movies, or having a picnic. The point is to learn how to enjoy your own company, and to not stop living your life just because you have no one to go with.
With more and more people living alone, moving to a new city alone, or just having smaller social circles, the trend of the solo date is slowly changing our perceptions of solitude and loneliness from something to avoid into something to cherish.
I think we can all agree doing things alone for the first time feels really strange. It feels unnatural, because we are conditioned to seek a partner or a companion for everything we do. We grow up learning to fear solitude, to never be seen as the loner. The people with the most friends are the most desired and are perceived to have the happiest life. Although, as we age we learn that is far from the truth.
How many times have you wanted to go to a concert, try a new restaurant, take a trip, or whatever it may be, but ‘couldn’t’ because you had no one to accompany you. Then we sit at home, marinating in our frustration and regret.
In these moments, did you ever wish you had the balls to go on your own?
You don’t have to wish it, you can do it, says the millions of people who are going on solo dates, solo traveling, and not letting the schedules of other people stop them from doing the things they want to do.
One of the most empowering feelings is knowing that you can do something by yourself. Accomplishing a task without help makes you feel strong, smart, and confident. That’s why solo dates are so empowering.
We are so scared to be seen alone. We think people will assume we have no friends. Keyword: assume. It’s the judgement we are afraid of. Although, people who judge others for doing things alone, are probably just intimidated. After you go on your first solo date, and return unscathed, it’s like a big ‘fuck you’ to the world because you quickly realize its actually pretty fun, and surprisingly easy.
After all, the person we need to nurture our relationship with the most is ourselves. By going on these solo dates, you are telling yourself, and the world, how much you enjoy your own company. Thats honestly pretty badass. Nothing says ‘this person is confident’ more than going out to dinner alone, and not batting an eye about it.
Despite the word ‘solo’ in the name, solo dates aren’t reserved for people who are single. Even those in a committed relationship, throuple, or a family of 12, can enjoy the benefits of a solo date, and should. Its empowering in different ways for different people. A mom of multiple young kids can enjoy a respite on a solo date of her own. A single individual in a place where they know no one can turn loneliness into an adventure of exploring their new city.
Being comfortable enough with ourselves to enjoy spending time alone is the ultimate form of self love. It’s scary at first, but by embracing solitude and recharging your social battery every once in awhile, it will only make your other relationships, and entire life, more full of love and abundance, because you have a strong foundation where it counts, within yourself.